Monday, January 30, 2012

A year ago today...

I was literally smack in the middle of the duration of bed rest. I took five minute showers each day (believe me I really looked forward to them), Jake was stuck doing laundry, making dinner, grocery shopping, and cleaning house. He had lots of help from my Grandmother who'd come and hang out with me at least one day a week.

He was doing a fabulous job managing it all, I will forever be grateful. But I have to admit, I was miserable. Do you know how boring it is to lay in bed alllllllllll day long? I did it though, for the babies. The babies that we prayed would stay put for much longer. I also took some criticism too for choosing home over the hospital during those weeks of bed rest.

Doctors advocated for it, but the Peri also admitted that he understood my reasoning and would work with me if I chose to go home. I did spend a few days in the hospital thru out this time, for steroid shots, and initially for antibiotics and IV fluids. But being in the hospital was my biggest fear and I deep down feared my anxiety of being in the hospital would send me in to labor sooner rather then later.

I knew the risk of coming home and say what you want, but I wanted nothing more then TWO healthy babies. I believed it could still happen if I stayed home. I also knew that meant at a moments notice, if I felt the least bit off I had to go to the hospital right away. The agreement was, I'd stay home (after getting the steroid shots and things being as normal as they could be in my situation) and that if anything changed I would then make the decision to stay. The moment that either baby seemed to be in distress, or the prognosis changed that was it. Yes I know I am lucky that we made it to the hospital in time, and I know it could have turned out differently.

If I had to do it all over again, I would have to say that at this point, yes I would make the same choice. It's not a choice for everyone and that's ok, but it's a choice that I made with my husband's support and agreement. Had it not been for him, things would have been so very different.

Now this year, in less then two weeks our amazing miracles will turn 1. Oh how time changes things.





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